As much as I wish this blog more frequently probed the goings-on of the Cryptocurrency Singularity, or ponied up frolicsome Senior Moments, or knocked around belvederes on the impending Psychic Crystal Drug Apocalypse (we all wear Converse), this is about fantasy football; and more importantly, The Lombardi Three.
From this Thursday to Christmas Day, over the next 110 days, I encourage each of you to abort any vacation plans you had, cancel your kid’s birthday party, torpedo that two-week bag-juice cleanse the misses wants to do together (that shit sounds horrifying), postpone your dissertation work on Hyperbolic Discounting (a terrible subject about why you make terrible life choices), abrogate any work commitments, personal commitments, play dates, double dates, date nights, movie nights, fight nights, tickle fights, and pillow bites, and focus on what’s important – the Lombardi Three trophy. On this day in history, look at what so many others have accomplished:
0070 – Roman emperor Titus occupies and plunders Jerusalem
1228 – Roman emperor Frederick lands in Israel, restores Jerusalem (aka Sixth Crusade)
1652 – 15,000 Han farmers go full militia on the Dutch and kick their asses out of Taiwan
1911 – French poet Apollinaire arrested for stealing the Mona Lisa from the Louvre (baller move)
1927 – TV is invented; let me repeat – TV is invented today
1945 – Japanese surrender Wake Island to U.S. Marines (ooh rah!)
1997 – Lockheed Martin launches Maiden flight of the F-22 Raptor
2017 – Dawning of Sixth Crusade of the Lombardi Three
This is YOUR year. This is YOURS for the taking. Yeah YOU. I smell a champion in you like a fart in a car.
By the way, Week 1 Ball Gazer forms are due by kickoff of tonight’s game. Due to the postponement of the Tampa Bay – Miami game, the resulting threshold is 13 out of 15 picks. Technically this is 0.83% easier than getting 14 out of 16 picks. Thanks Irma!
Here’s one more little gift for you from our darling league radical, Schoolya’gain. This is a great piece on Michael Bennett, older brother of Green Bay Packer TE, Martellus Bennett.
SEAHAWKS’ MICHAEL BENNETT IS AN ACTIVIST DISGUISED AS A FOOTBALL PLAYER
The Lombardi Three 