It’s taken five years to trim the fat. We are lean. It’s time to take this league to the next level. Brace yourself, because this is huge.

Beginning next season The Lombardi Three will launch its inaugural Lombardi Legends League. The Lombardi Legends will run alongside the regular season and contest the top four teams from the previous season against each other. The top four teams will be determined by the Win-Loss records from the full 16-week season, regardless of final standings following the playoffs. Tiebreaker is total points.

If we played the Lombardi Legends League this season, the following four teams would compete against each other in a separate league alongside our regular league. You would essentially be playing in two leagues at once.

Air Jordy 13-3
Schoolya’gain 11-5
Bagel Time 9-7 (2,874.70 points)
White Wes Welkers 9-7 (2,855.15 points)

Last season’s champ, RGIII’s Company, also finished the season at 9-7 but would lose the tiebreaker with only 2,804.00 total points.

 The Lombardi Legends League buy-in will be $40/team and follow a winner-take-all format. The lineups will be bare-bones consisting of: QB, RB, WR, WR, TE, K, DEF and there will only be three bench spots. The scoring format will be similar to the current league’s PPR format. However, the playoff format will be two weeks per matchup and play across four weeks (weeks 13-16).

The Lombardi Legends draft will take place during the week leading up to the Regular Season draft. With only four teams and ten rounds, the draft will not take long. Draft order will be randomized.

This style play will leave little room for error and truly test the fantasy football coach’s skills as you will have a large pool of free agents to choose from each week. This is fantasy football in its purest form.

Heroes get remembered, but legends never die.
-Babe Ruth (that shit he said in The Sandlot)

‘Chopped’ with Bill Belichick

*opens basket*

The three ingredients are Jacoby Brissett, Japanese Cucumbers, and Cumin Loaf.

*brings judges to tears with entrée*

I’ll tell you, Aaron Rodgers, he’s really a party pooper.

I work some hours at an office and, you know, and the groups of peoples there they’re talking and one say about Aaron Rodgers to another colleague, “oh, I tell you Aaron he’s, he’s really a party pooper.”

Aaron poops at parties? So he poops at parties and peoples know this?

I poop at parties. I poop at parties but peoples don’t know because I close the door. Aaron goes to the party and then, poops? But he do it so peoples know? Where do he go for it? Does he visit a watercloset and make the door opens so peoples may see inside there?

Sounds horrible.

No one made the cut in Week 2. Week 3 is your last shot at a Bench Swap this season. Min to win is 12 out of 16. You do you.
Week 2 results..

12-4
Air Jordy

11-5
Schoolya’gain
Wanted Dez or Alive

9-7
Lake Hickory Swallops
Trouble Hunter
White Wes Welkers

8-8
Bagel Time
RGIII’s Company
Tannehill for President

7-9
Eastside Forty-Ounces
Reason to Kerrigan
The Whiteshadow
Unlockin Yo Schtuff

5-11
IJamAllDay

Highlights include: Trouble Hunter as the only squad to pick the Titans win; Wanted Dez or Alive was the only squad that bet on the 49ers; every IJamAllDay pick; and, only Schoolya’gain and The Whiteshadow picked the Vikes over the Packers. The rest of the picks were all over the place. Whatevs.

Technically, you don’t have to submit these things. It’s your prerogative whether or not you want to try and earn a Bench Swap. But I’d be remiss if I didn’t at least remind the FNGs. That said, we are doing it again this week colleagues. And since no one hit the mother load last week the min to win is now 13 out of 16. Hasn’t been done yet, but I have a good feeling about you people.

Postscript – I will likely be off the grid this weekend, so I won’t be able to respond to any bitchy texts about the mobile app, or overturn any intoxicated trades you regretfully knuckleballed out there. My office is closed. I am going to catch a delicious bass.

To the newcomers in the league, we’ve had a pretty good run with NFL.com. This was the first year we have had any real technical issues. The NFL Digital Care team finally got back to us and detachedly addressed some of the issues we are having with the app. They were also very nonchalant about the fact that it will be at least a few weeks or so to work out the kinks. Oh, really?!?

I’ve posted their comments about the app below (highpoints underlined, translation provided where necessary) if you are interested in reading, but the only cookie you should grab out of this little care basket is the following guidance for accessing the full site from your mobile device. I always use this view on my iPhone instead of the mobile app.

*To access the full site on mobile, go to m.fantasy.nfl.com in your browser, select the hamburger menu icon at the top left, scroll to the bottom of the menu, and select ‘Full Site’. Boom!

Thank you for contacting NFL Fantasy about our new app.

To view your pending trades and waiver claims, scroll to Overview on the My Team page. WAB capabilities and viewing other teams’ trades will be added in time. Push notifications and the Reserve position will also be coming soon. The old app is no longer available for download.

The ability to Edit League Settings and Edit Team Settings will be coming soon. For now, please use the full site. To access the full site on mobile, go to m.fantasy.nfl.com, select the menu icon to the top left, scroll to the bottom of the menu, and select ‘Full Site’.

Error saving lineup:

We are aware of an issue that prevented teams from changing their lineups. We think this issue has been fixed.

We are aware of an issue keeping lineup changes from reflecting correctly in the app. In most cases, it is simply a case of the app not reflecting correctly. Please refresh the app or log in to our mobile site to see your accurate lineup.

If you are unable to access your team in the app:

First, please delete/re-install the app on your mobile device. If you are using the full site, please clear your browser history/cache.

If you have been signing in with your email address, try signing in with your username instead. If you’ve already been signing in with the username, try the email address. (Translation: We have no god-damned clue which one you are supposed to use!)

Please note: We are aware of an issue that is keeping co-owners from accessing their teams in the app. We will have this issue fixed in the coming weeks.

We appreciate you playing at NFL.com. (Translation: We give zero fucks about being a serious fantasy football platform, so much so that we didn’t have a mobile app prepared prior to the start of the regular season. GFY.)

Don’t get your panties all soiled, it’s a homophone. You know, a play on words. I wish we had something to say about legendary pro-wrestler Dusty Rhodes. He was the Diablo Canyon OG, the Midnight Rider, Texas Outlaw, Son of a Plumber, and “The American Dream” personified. Dude played semi-pro ball in the Continental Football League before his team folded, and probably slammed more muff than Hulk Hogan. Look at the guy – he had to be the Indiana Jones of exploring crotch. May he rest in peace.

The dust may have settled from the draft weekend festivities, but like Kerrigan’s place, it’s not gonna be an easy clean up. We have arduous, dusty roads ahead ladies and gentleman and your rosters will be stretched to their limits. Draft report cards are in and the results are spread pretty evenly, indicating a relatively balanced league with no real outliers. Additionally, a 14-team roster leaves the free agent pool competitively thin. How you drafted across BYE weeks will play an important role in your core results.

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.
-Vince Lombardi

The technical difficulties with the draft client and the mobile app were borne across the board. I promise you were not alone. I did reach out to NFL.com for feedback on…“what in the holy fuck happened” (I think were my words). I haven’t heard back yet which either means (a) they were mobbed with emails from across the fantasysphere and haven’t gotten around to our little camp yet, or (b) they have no clue what went wrong and are still frisking the mainframe.

Luckily the issues during the last few rounds were during the last few rounds. We were all looking for scraps at that point anyway. And yours truly ended up with a SUS and an INJ on 2 out of the last 3 picks. A total of 5 of my picks were auto-drafted because of technical issues, including picks 2 and 3. Just sayin’ brah.

Nevertheless, I do take responsibility for the failure. I promise to look in to alternatives next season, even if it means we ditch NFL.com all together. We were damn close once before. Plus I am seeing a few more ads this year compared to last, and this season’s version of the mobile app hasn’t been that impressive as of yet. I do recommend you start playing around with the app and getting used to how it works. From the looks of it, you change your roster via Game Center and not via your Team page. That took a few clicks to figure out. Do your homework guys. Moving on.

Report Cards

For those that didn’t automatically trash your report cards and were able to forward them to me I thank you. I’ve put together a little 3-year historical look at how each of our teams (submitted) has drafted compared to how the season ended. As you can see, the results indicate nothing other than the fact that I continue to waste my time with this shit. Enjoy.

Your fate is what you make it.
-Sarah Connor (obviously referring to fantasy football)